Everyone’s A Little Bit Racist

avenueq

有次慢跑, 老闆提夫說, 我們這個世代的人, 多數來講, 再怎麼開放, 我們還是很習慣的給人標上顏色,  白色黃色咖啡色黑色, 比方說, 他還是習慣會講, 你們台灣人如何我們美國人如何而印度人阿發跟喜弟又是如何, 雖然只是出於對不同習性習慣風俗的好奇, 做一番趣味討論, 然而他的孩子這個世代, 幾乎都是色盲, 根本連有膚色這回事都不知道, 讓我想起兩年前在紐約看的一個Broadway show, Avenue Q, 裡面的一首歌:Everyone’s A Little Bit Racist.

這首歌聽得我百感交集, 是的, 如此幸運的我, 的確是百感交集。

和歷屆我所認識Massart的台灣/中國學生比起來, 我真的是屬於非常安靜的學生, 因為呢, 我溫順怕生, 又怕丟臉, 所以話少。逆來順受的我本人, 實在是十分期望外國同學可以伸出援手跟我說話。有了算撿到, 沒有, 也覺得正常, 反正我在講中文的聚會也是這樣, 對於生人一樣說不上話。大家都是剛進入學校, 每個人都在怕生, 都在尋找浮木, 只是說英文講的好比較容易找到木頭可抱, 既然都踏出江湖了, 皮就拉緊一點。所以我不懂, 為什麼很多人出國來唸書, 總喜歡抱怨講英文的人都混在一起不跟他玩, 阿你自己不是也都跟講中文的人混在一起嗎? 人家他們也在害羞阿! 有的人會抱怨美國人沒有傳說中的親切不熱心助人, 奇怪捏, 你到底是去哪裡聽來的傳說, 美國人有欠你嗎..=_=…。受到幫助是一種福氣, 是禮物, 不是應該要視為理所當然的事情(是有人天天收到禮物嗎?!), 更不要假弱勢之名, 行公主病之實。把自己歸為弱勢, 是在利用人性的弱點使人愧疚, 比起不伸出手的人, 這樣有比較正確嗎? 更何況, 是自己選擇的路, 自己選擇跳入苦海, 又為什麼怪罪海的苦呢?

阿, 講著講著, 突然火氣就上來了, 整個脫離遠本要走的歡樂氣氛了…囧..總之呢, racist(種族歧視)這回事, Avenue Q用著輕鬆詼諧的方式唱了出來, 聽的心有戚戚, 不好意思的摸頭摸腦, 臉上又止不住的微笑起來。很多時候, 事情沒有那麼嚴重, 很多時候, 不需要計較太小的事情, 殊不知理直氣壯的當時, 腦子裡的盲點俯拾即是阿。(撿~)

下面找到的影片不知道是那邊的公開演出有人用攝影機路下來, 算是目前找到的影片裡唱的最好的嚕, 女主角很不錯, 讓我回到當時看秀的感覺, 大家來看影片八~~

Everyone’s A Little Bit Racist/Avenue Q

Princeton:
Say, Kate, can I ask you a question?
Kate Monster:
Sure!

Princeton:
Well, you know Trekkie Monster upstairs?

Kate Monster:
Uh huh.

Princeton:
Well, he’s Trekkie Monster, and you’re Kate Monster.

Kate Monster:
Right.

Princeton:
You’re both Monsters.

Kate Monster:
Yeah.

Princeton:
Are you two related?

Kate Monster:
What?! Princeton, I’m surprised at you! I find that racist!

Princeton:
Oh, well, I’m sorry! I was just asking!

Kate Monster:
Well, it’s a touchy subject.
No, not all Monsters are related.
What are you trying say, huh?
That we all look the same to you?
Huh, huh, huh?

Princeton:
No, no, no, not at all. I’m sorry,
I guess that was a little racist.

Kate Monster:
I should say so. You should be much more
careful when you’re talking about the
sensitive subject of race.

Princeton:
Well, look who’s talking!

Kate Monster:
What do you mean?

Princeton:
What about that special Monster School you told me about?

Kate Monster:
What about it?

Princeton:
Could someone like me go there?

Kate Monster:
No, we don’t want people like you-

Princeton:
You see?!

You’re a little bit racist.

Kate Monster:
Well, you’re a little bit too.

Princeton:
I guess we’re both a little bit racist.

Kate Monster:
Admitting it is not an easy thing to do…

Princeton:
But I guess it’s true.

Kate Monster:
Between me and you,
I think

Both:
Everyone’s a little bit racist
Sometimes.
Doesn’t mean we go
Around committing hate crimes.
Look around and you will find
No one’s really color blind.
Maybe it’s a fact
We all should face
Everyone makes judgments
Based on race.

Princeton:
Now not big judgments, like who to hire
or who to buy a newspaper from –

Kate Monster:
No!

Princeton:
No, just little judgments like thinking that Mexican
busboys should learn to speak goddamn English!

Kate Monster:
Right!

Both:
Everyone’s a little bit racist
Today.
So, everyone’s a little bit racist
Okay!
Ethinic jokes might be uncouth,
But you laugh because
They’re based on truth.
Don’t take them as
Personal attacks.
Everyone enjoys them –
So relax!

Princeton:
All right, stop me if you’ve heard this one.

Kate Monster:
Okay!

Princeton:
There’s a plan going down and there’s only
one paracute. And there’s a rabbi, a priest…

Kate Monster:
And a black guy!

Gary Coleman:
Whatchoo talkin’ ’bout Kate?

Kate Monster:
Uh…

Gary Coleman:
You were telling a black joke!

Princeton:
Well, sure, Gary, but lots of people tell black jokes.

Gary Coleman:
I don’t.

Princeton:
Well, of course you don’t – you’re black!
But I bet you tell Polack jokes, right?

Gary Coleman:
Well, sure I do. Those stupid Polacks!

Princeton:
Now, don’t you think that’s a little racist?

Gary Coleman:
Well, damn, I guess you’re right.

Kate Monster:
You’re a little bit racist.

Gary Coleman:
Well, you’re a little bit too.

Princeton:
We’re all a little bit racist.

Gary Coleman:
I think that I would
Have to agree with you.

Princeton/Kate Monster:
We’re glad you do.

Gary Coleman:
It’s sad but true!
Everyone’s a little bit racist –

All right!

Kate Monster:
All right!

Princeton:
All right!

Gary Coleman:
All right!
Bigotry has never been
Exclusively white

All:
If we all could just admit
That we are racist a little bit,
Even though we all know
That it’s wrong,
Maybe it would help us
Get along.

Princeton:
Oh, Christ do I feel good.

Gary Coleman:
Now there was a fine upstanding black man!

Princeton:
Who?

Gary Coleman:
Jesus Christ.

Kate Monster:
But, Gary, Jesus was white.

Gary Coleman:
No, Jesus was black.

Kate Monster:
No, Jesus was white.

Gary Coleman:
No, I’m pretty sure that Jesus was black-

Princeton:
Guys, guys…Jesus was Jewish!

Brian:
Hey guys, what are you laughing about?

Gary Coleman:
Racism!

Brian:
Cool.

Christmas Eve:
BRIAN! Come back here!
You take out lecycuraburs!

Princeton:
What’s that mean?

Brian:
Um, recyclables.
Hey, don’t laugh at her!
How many languages do you speak?

Kate Monster:
Oh, come off it, Brian!
Everyone’s a little bit racist.

Brian:
I’m not!

Princeton:
Oh no?

Brian:
Nope!

How many Oriental wives
Have you got?

Christmas Eve:
What? Brian!

Princeton:
Brian, buddy, where you been?
The term is Asian-American!

Christmas Eve:
I know you are no
Intending to be
But calling me Oriental –
Offensive to me!

Brian:
I’m sorry, honey, I love you.

Christmas Eve:
And I love you.

Brian:
But you’re racist, too.

Christmas Eve:
Yes, I know.
The Jews have all
The money
And the whites have all
The power.
And I’m always in taxi-cab
With driver who no shower!

Princeton:
Me too!

Kate Monster:
Me too!

Gary Coleman:
I can’t even get a taxi!

All:
Everyone’s a little bit racist
It’s true.
But everyone is just about
As racist as you!
If we all could just admit
That we are racist a little bit,
And everyone stopped being
So PC
Maybe we could live in –
Harmony!

Christmas Eve:
Evlyone’s a ritter bit lacist!

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4 thoughts on “Everyone’s A Little Bit Racist

  1. 我還記得那時候去紐約看這部劇
    抽到用不到三十塊美金坐第一排
    那時候這件事情是當窮學生最大的幸福了

  2. 挖!真划算!!你怎樣買的阿~~我那次買了半價的票, 含稅之後快七十, 但位置很好, 大概11排, 超讚的~~

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